How I Met Your Brother
by TheTrueAwesomeness
Summary: Sakura always said nothing good ever happens after 2 AM. Sasuke should have listened, but instead he went over to her place asking her to explain exactly how she and his Aniki, of all people, ended up dating. He had no choice but to listen as she began her long story by saying, "Sasuke, this is the story of How I Met Your Brother."
1. Prologue

**Title:** How I Met Your Brother

**Author:** TheTrueAwesomeness

**Rating:** K+

**Setting:** Alternate Universe with a bit of Ninja World parts (Not sure yet)

**Pairings:** Sakura X Itachi

**Genre: **Romance and Humor

**Disclaimer:** I do not own the rights to any characters from Naruto. This story, however, is mine.

**Summary:** Sakura always said nothing good ever happens after 2 AM. Sasuke should have listened, but instead he went over to her place asking her to explain exactly how she and his Aniki, of all people, ended up dating. He had no choice but to listen as she began her long story by saying, "Sasuke, this is the story of How I Met Your Brother."

* * *

**Prologue**

To say that Sasuke was stunned is an understatement, the understatement of millennia, to be exact. It had been funny at first, seeing his face change from his usual mask of apathy to shock, then disgust, then hopelessness, finally settling on the one emotion he never had qualms showing: annoyance.

The look of hopelessness was something Sakura had never thought she'd see on the raven-haired man's face, but she understood what it meant; Sasuke knew well enough that nothing he did or say was going to change the situation. No matter how uncomfortable he was.

She glanced around at her circle of friends. Ino and Naruto were arguing about something or the other, their voices louder than necessary. Hinata was sitting next to the male loud mouth, keenly listening, ready to jump in, in case the two idiots needed a judge or referee, which happened more often than Sakura would like to admit, those two were as immature as they got. She recalled all those times when they argued about who her_ real _best friend was. She remembered the most recent Sakura-best-friend debate the two blondes had like it was only yesterday. Oh wait, it was yesterday. She resisted the urge to shake her head. Those idiots.

She laughed when, after rendering Ino speechless, Naruto said, "Hokage'd."

The three of them had already calmed down from their initial shock at seeing the date Sakura informed them she was going to bring on their regular night outs at the Ichiraku's. Their initial reactions had been hilarious: Naruto had first sputtered like a fish out of water before he managed to find his voice and prattled on about how she shouldn't be dating him, asking why Sakura had never told them she even had a boyfriend, his protests only ending when Sakura finally hit him particularly hard on the head, pointing out that _this_ reaction was exactly why she kept her relationship a secret in the first place; All Ino could do was wolf whistle, after she pulled the pinkette aside asking her how she had managed to get such a hot piece of ass, wondering aloud how she herself had never gotten him in her grasp being a girl who infamously "got around", if you know what I mean; Hinata was the only sensible one, shaking hands with the new addition to their group and treating him like he had always belonged.

That was earlier that night, now, with midnight slowly taking over, they all sat together like his presence wasn't out of the ordinary.

The only one really affected was Sasuke who was brooding more than usual, Sakura observed. She couldn't really blame him though, she felt slightly guilty, she had sprung the whole thing on him, she had given him no hints, no warnings whatsoever; his annoyance and sulking was justified. After all, it was _his Aniki_ she was dating. She knew he was going to ask her to explain as soon as they were alone. That was a meeting she wasn't really looking forward to, so for the mean time the pink-haired woman decided she would enjoy the evening. She smiled at her boyfriend, gave him a peck on the cheek and then jumped into the conversation her best friends were having to give her opinion on whatever INOvation the pig was rambling on about.

* * *

Sakura sighed as she and Itachi entered her apartment. They were both tired and eager to jump into bed and sleep entangled in each other's arms, but they knew well enough that the night was far from over. There was still Sasuke and his inevitable need for an explanation.

"They warmed up to you quickly, didn't they?" Sakura beamed up at her love. She was utterly thrilled.

"Indeed they did," he agreed. "Except for my otouto, of course. He was being more of a brat than usual." Sakura looked a bit deflated.

Itachi smirked and put his arms around her from behind and nuzzled his cheek against hers. "Sakura," he said in a serious tone despite the affection he was giving her, "I am certain that I will not have you to myself tonight for much longer, I know my otouto will be arriving any minute now. I do not wish for him to keep you for long, so I am asking you, be as concise as possible."

She laughed, turning to look at Itachi as if he said something utterly ridiculous and un-Sakura-like. "It does _not_ take me long to tell stories, Itachi."

He gave her a look that screamed _Chyeah, right._ "I am serious," he told her, "I expect you to be in bed with me within an hour."

Sakura scoffed. "You could just do the explaining with me, you know. To 'shorten' my explanation. As if that's needed."

"I would," Itachi began, "But I do not think my brother wishes to hear it from me. At least not tonight. I will talk to him when he is ready for me to talk to him."

He put his arms around her once more just as the doorbell rang, "One hour," he told her sternly, before giving her a lingering kiss and making his way to the bedroom.

"Okay, Itachi. Knowing your brother he'd want me to go straight to the point anyways. I'll be hugging you before you know it." She called after him. Itachi flawlessly executed the habit he had acquired from being with his impish girlfriend for so long, he rolled his eyes.

* * *

"Sasuke," Sakura smiled at him as she opened the front door wider to let him in. "Would you like some t-"

"Just cut to the chase, Sakura." He told her in an irate, tired voice. All he wanted to do was learn how she and his aniki - he resisted the urge to shiver in disgust - ended up being an item and then go home and sleep and pretend when he woke up in the morning that all of it was a dream. "Just tell me exactly how all of this happened so we can all sleep. It's almost 2:30 and like you always say 'Nothing good ever happens after 2 AM'."

A vein twitched in the pinkette's temple. Sasuke was going to be rude about this, hmmm? She was about to offer him some of his favorite tomatoes to try and make him feel comfortable, but if that was how he was going to act...

She smiled sweetly at him, guilt forgotten. He could see the evil glint his teammate had in her eyes. "Okay, Sasuke, I'll 'cut to the chase' and tell you '_exactly_ how all of this happened'." The raven-haired man couldn't ignore the sarcasm he heard in her voice.

She sat him down in the middle couch and took a seat on the chair directly in front of him. Her smile grew even more sickeningly sweet. The younger Uchiha knew well enough that this was not going to be brief, story telling was Sakura's forte. Especially the drawn out kind of story telling. Maybe he should have stayed at home and talked to her in the morning.

"Sasuke," she looked at him seriously, "this is the story of How I Met Your Brother."

* * *

From inside the bedroom Itachi heard the entire conversation his pink-haired partner and otouto exchanged. He did not miss the obvious irritiation in Sakura's voice followed by her sarcasm at being concise. He sighed, she was going to take more than an hour.

* * *

A/N: Soooo, waddya all think? I normally write SasuXSaku stories, but my OTP is actually Itachi and Sakura. I love Itachi. X3 I've always been hesitant about writing about them though, I'm afraid that I might not do them any justice. But this idea has been in my list-of-fic-ideas for a while now, and since HIMYM is ending soon (two episodes left *cries*) I wanted to make this as a sort-of tribute. I made sure to incorporate a few quintessentially HIMYM things but with a Naruto twist, and also there is one line from the Fairly Odd Parents (who got that? You rock. XD) I'm trying to mix the personalities of the characters from HIMYM with the corresponding ones from Naruto without making them too OC. I hope it's working.

Should I continue this story? O.o Reviews will be very much appreciated. =) (Actually, authors need reviews to thrive. We die when we don't get any. XD)


	2. Chapter 1

**Title: **How I Met Your Brother

**Author:** TheTrueAwesomeness

**Rating:** K+

**Setting:** Alternate Universe with a bit of Ninja World parts (Not sure yet)

**Pairings:** Sakura X Itachi

**Genre:** Romance and Humor

**Disclaimer:** I do not own the rights to any characters from Naruto. I don't own How I Met Your Mother either. This story, however, is mine.

**Summary: **Sakura always said nothing good ever happens after 2 AM. Sasuke should have listened, but instead he went over to her place asking her to explain exactly how she and his Aniki, of all people, ended up dating. He had no choice but to listen as she began her long story by saying, "Sasuke, this is the story of How I Met Your Brother."

* * *

**Chapter 1**

_Sasuke, in the summer of 2005, I had just finished Med School._

_It was an overwhelming feeling, being free from the suffocating grasp of the educational system. I had spent more than three-quarters of my life reading books and reviewing night after night - only leaving the house to hang out at Ichiraku's with the gang - to become a doctor, and when I finally graduated, without the constant need to stay in at night to study, for a brief moment I was unsure with what to do with myself. So I took that summer off to 'see the world', something I was never really able to do. I realized that meeting someone nice and dating was something I had never done, so that night I had only one goal._

* * *

8th August, 2005

"Guys, tonight, I will meet _the one._" Sakura raised her glass to her three best friends who raised their glasses to her, cheering like she had won the Nobel prize or something.

"Hang on, Sakura-chan," Naruto said after a huge slurp of his ramen. "You can't expect to meet _the one_ when you've just entered the dating game."

Sakura raised her eyebrows, "Why not? You and Hinata have that whole please-fix-my-broken-stereo-love-at-first-sight story. Now you're egaged! Why can't I have that on my first go?"

_- Sasuke, I'm sure you already know this, but I would just want to reiterate because you can't stop me. During our first week of college Hinata's stereo broke so she walked around her dormitory looking for someone to help her fix it. She knocked on a random door, one that she claims until this day had "called to her" and was stunned when the guy who opened it was this cute blonde, Naruto. It was love at first sight. -_

"We're not saying what happened to us can't happen to you, Sakura-chan," a blushing, ever soft-spoken Hinata said, "We're just saying don't expect too much is all."

The pink-haired girl sighed and was about to open her mouth when Ino beat her to it, "Besides, Forehead, why would you want to meet _the one_ on your first try? That is so boring -"

"Hey!" Naruto and Hinata said in unison.

"- you should test the waters, sleep around and never call the guy again, and then repeat the next night -"

"Ino-pig! I can't do that!" a horror-stricken Sakura exclaimed. Of course she was ignored.

"- stick with me, kid, I can show you the ropes. teach you everything I know. It's going to be Fa- wait for it -bulous! Fabulous." Ino told her with a wink.

The pinkette groaned and stood from her seat at their usual booth, "I'm going to get more beer," she mumbled.

"Cool, I'll go with," Ino said, missing how Sakura wanted a few minutes alone.

"Too beers, please." Sakura politely told the barman. She sighed, resting her chin on her hand.

"Forehead, chill out. Tonight is only your first night of freedom! Don't expect to meet _the one_ so soon." The female blond said, "Listen," she said conspiratorially, "I'll even help you meet a guy."

"No, okay? I don't need help. Especially since I'm not interested in the kind of guys you like," she said, her nose crinkling in disgust.

Ino did not react what her best friend said. Not even at the direct insult to the kind of guys she liked. She didn't care. She had other things on in her mind, most of those skeevy plots and complicated plans. The look Ino gave her was pure innocence with an underlying tone of mischief that only someone who knew her as much as Sakura did could spot.

This was not good.

"I'm your best friend, right, Sakura?" She asked suddenly.

Hesitantly, the pinkette nodded. "What are you up to no-"

"Say I'm your best friend."

A sigh, "You're my best friend," she conceded.

"Good," Ino said with a flourish, "then as your best friend, it is my best friendly duty to play, with you, a certain game I'd like to call -" she tapped a random guy's shoulder, Sakura was furious, "- Have you met Sakura?"

The anger on her face was replaced by her willing smile as a guy with brown hair and brown eyes and red triangles on his cheeks turned to look at her, "Hi, I'm Sakura," she said sweetly, glaring at Ino once before returning her eyes to the stranger who had fallen into the pig's game. Ino winked and walked back to their table.

"Hey, Sakura. I'm Kiba."

* * *

"- and then I said, that's not a dog, that's my mom!" Sakura couldn't help but laugh with the guy Ino had introduced her to, er, to whom she was introduced, rather. Especially since his laugh was so infectious. She couldn't help but smile, he was incredibly funny and hyper, he worked with dogs, not to mention he was good-looking.

All she wanted to do was keep talking to him. "What brings you to Ichiraku's? I've never seen you around here before. At least, I don't think. I mean, I'd remember a guy with such unique, dare I say, adorable birthmarks on his cheeks." Her smile was flirtatious.

Kiba only laughed good-naturedly. "I'm actually waiting for my girlfriend."

Sakura's face fell, but Kiba didn't seem to notice. "I was afraid that I was going to be bored while waiting for her, it's a great thing your friend introduced us." His smile, the pink-haired noticed only then - to her dismay - was friendly. Not at all hopeful for romance like she had imagined.

Looks like she wasn't going to get the Naruto-Hinata-first-time's-the-charm love story. Figures.

"Oh, there she is," Kiba told her, pointing at a girl Sakura was too sad to observe all that well. The only thing that registered in her mind was that the girl was frowning. _You and me both, sister_.

"Thank you for keeping me company." He grinned. She smiled weakly back as she watched him walk towards his unhappy girlfriend before they exited Ichiraku's.

Before the pink-haired girl could sigh, Ino was already by her side. Her surprise at the sudden appearance of a head in front of hers made her forget her melancholy. That is until the pig said, "Ooooh, I'm sorry, Forehead."

She was dragged back to their table, Naruto and Hinata gave her pitying looks, but she knew those looks were not because the guy she had talked to for nearly an hour had a girlfriend, but because Ino was too insistent, "Luckily, as your best friend-"

Naruto coughed, Ino glared at him.

"- as your _best friend_ and wingwoman, I get to play that game with you until one guy, preferably unattached, goes home with you."

As if on cue, a guy passed by their table, but the only thing she noticed about him was that he had his long, black hair tied in a ponytail on his nape, because she was too busy staring in horror at Ino's hand that was reaching for his shoulder as an attempt to call his attention, simultaneously her mouth was opening to say "Haaaaa-"

She was not ready to have another round of "Have You Met Sakura?", so she did what any mature person would do: she ducked under the table before there was any hand-shoulder contact. She waited for a few seconds but all she heard was silence. She peaked over the table and saw Ino's hand still lifted in the same position it had been in before she hid. The ponytail man who was supposed to be Ino's second player, Sakura noticed, was already exiting Ichiraku's.

Sakura sighed in relief.

"Aww, come on, Forehead! How are you going to meet a guy and bang him if you're too afraid to meet him!"

The pinkette looked at her two other best friends sitting around the table. _Help._

"You're being too hard on Sakura-chan, Ino. The first guy she talked to turned out to have a girlfriend, let her adjust to this frightening new world your introducing her to." Hinata said.

Ino was about to say something, but Sakura cut her off, "I'll meet guys through my own pace, Ino-pig. No offense, but I don't want to sleep around. I don't want to go flitting from one guy to another." She was feeling her speech so much, bent on making Ino understand her, that she just had to stand up. She looked at her blond friend in the eyes, "I don't want meaningless relationships, I want romance. I want to be swept of my feet. If I date any guys, if at all, I want it to be -"

Sakura lifted her eyes from her best friend's for a moment. They landed on the most captivating onyx eyes she had ever seen. Those eyes belonged to, of course, the most handsome man she had ever been in the same room with, he had pale skin and raven-colored hair that reminded her a bit of cockatoos. Before she could turn away, his eyes met hers, and he smirked at her.

The world stopped All Sakura could do was breathe, "- the one."

* * *

A/N: I realize that the pairing on this fanfic is ItaSaku, but in true HIMYM fashion, with Sakura telling Sasuke how she met Itachi, she will also be paired with other guys. To make up for the lack of ItaSaku, I will be adding a few "present time" scenes. Because, even though I enjoy pairing Sakura with other guys, particularly with Sasuke (which there will be a lot of in this Fic), I love ItaSaku the most. X3 Also, I won't be following HIMYM's ending (WHYYYY?! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY?! :'( )... or will I? HAHAHAHA. Itachi made a little cameo in this chapter. I hope you enjoyed it. Please leave a review. =)


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